Love and Marriage.......

Have you and your spouse ever planned a big romantic getaway only to find that once alone together, you fall in the same argument you've had twenty times before? Or are you like another couple who will float through such a vacation together, giving in to one another's wishes, burying past disappointments and ignoring any suggestion of conflict. If you are, the odds are neither of you would say what's really on your minds; there's no friction and nobody gets hurt. Or perhaps you and your mate are like another couple, no longer spending such time together. She's caught up in a whirl of chores, taking care of the kids, trying to get the house in order; while he's working on his computer, watching TV, or puttering somewhere. The two of you may be living in opposite universe under the same roof.

You wonder, what happened to all the laughter and affection.  When did life together become so bland and colorless?  There used to be more passion.  And yet this is the person you loved so deeply when you got married, the person you sincerely meant to stick with through the joys and hardships of life.

My personal life has not been a stream of great wisdom in understanding relationships. My marriage is not perfect and have experienced some pitfalls in our relationship. This is the reason why I'm in pursuit of the truth about what tears a marriage apart or binds it together. I would like to share some of the things I've learned, I hope that somehow, it would help you.

1. Enhance romance, be on the lookout for a hazard that destroys the spirit out of many marriages- the end of romance. Take plenty of time out to cherish your marriage. Seek shared experiences that ignite your passion for one another.  
2. Offer sincere and positive appreciation, with a little effort and understanding, you can replace thoughtless complaints and criticism with thoughtful remarks.  
3. Own up and be accountable, try saying "Sorry" or "I really shouldn't have done that".  These acknowledge that you know you made a mistake and will try not to do it again.
4. If you naturally throw back at your spouse accusations directed at you, try instead to acknowledge that you're not perfect and that maybe your partner has a point.  
5. Being understanding, compassionate, or validating is a profoundly effective way to repair communication. 
6. The most significant of all is to make God the center of your marriage.

Of course, there's more to a lasting marriage than disagreements.  To harbor stable marriages, couples need to continually celebrate those area where they can come together, and not let their differences pull them down.  Any marriage is made up of two individuals with conflicting needs, tastes, and interests.  They say that the happiest, most stable couples are those who accept that all marriages- and all spouses- have their limitations.  If you want to keep your marriage alive, it's necessary to rediscover or simply make time for those experiences that make you feel good about your spouse and your marriage.

Two are better than one;

Because they have a good reward for their labor.

For if they fall, the one will lift up his fellow,

But woe to him that is alone when he falls,

for he has not another to help him up.

And if the two lie together then they have warmth,

but how can one be warm alone?

And if one prevail against him,

two shall withstand him.

ECCLESIASTES, 1:9:12